Experiences From a Month Long Tech Detox
About a year ago I read a brilliant book entitled "Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World". This book completely changed the way that I interacted with technology as well as social media. I felt compelled to buy this book while taking a walk through a bookstore. I randomly and immediately found myself backing up as my head snapped to the right. This book was on the bottom shelf in a bright yellow colour. I grabbed it and walked to the checkout without even opening the book or looking at the back. This book changed my life.
Diving into the book, readers are asked to tackle a 1 month tech detox where they set strict and non-negotiable rules for their use of tech and make a vow to avoid using technology in any way other than what is required for work or life. My rules were as follows: 1) Check my email or phone only 3 times a day. 2) Avoid all social media (I wasn't on it anyways). 3) Check the news once a day. 4) Can use tech for work between the hours of 9 am and 5 pm. 5) No Youtube or media sites that offer millions of hours worth of mindless distraction. 6) No news or radio. At all.
Here's what happened:
I got a lot of stuff done. I mean...a lot. Suddenly I had hours worth of extra time in my life. Before, I would feel this almost alien compulsion to check a site like Youtube, looking for...something? What that something was, I could never say. All that I know is that I felt this need to look, scroll, find something that was "recommended" to me, watch it for 2 minutes and shut it off without ever learning anything. What I hadn't realized before is that even though I felt like I never had any time to myself, I was spending what time I DID have mindlessly scrolling the internet looking for something to give me a little bump, or to confirm something that I already knew. I was wasting the little time that I had. Now, I had a few extra hours to my day. I got back into my favorite hobbies such as drawing. I worked out more. I read or reread books. I went for more walks with my dog. I cleaned my house more, I organized my clothes and got rid of ones I wasn't wearing. I spent more time in the evenings talking with my wife, instead of huddling in separate corners and checking out of reality on tech. I enjoyed more quality time with my kid, and gave him my full and undivided attention when I had but a few precious hours with him a day.
I had significantly less anxiety: After just a few short (but incredibly long feeling) days, I noticed that I was no longer on edge. I didn't realize that underneath my awareness, this ever present hum of anxiety was always there; always colouring my reality in shades of yellow or red. Without the news and media endlessly shoving the negative events of the world into my ears all day long, I began to see that in my current world, things were indeed quite alright. The problems of the world were no longer mine to bear, and I was free to just live life, focusing on what was happening in my immediate environment. The amazing thing was, in my immediate environment, things were almost always quite peaceful, and for once I could see that without having a background narrator telling me about how terrible things were somewheres else.
I felt extremely lonely, especially in crowded places: I was never really one to pull out my phone when I was out and about, as usually I left it in my car or at home. Now that I had made the conscious decision to intentionally avoid it, I began to notice just how many people around me were physically there, but completely out of reality. I began to notice all the people walking down the street whose bodies were guiding them through pedestrian traffic, but without a shred of awareness as to what was happening. I began to notice people walking out into traffic while distracted, driving while distracted, eating while distracted, even trying to talk while distracted. I began to notice more and more, groups of people sitting together, completely silent, engaged with virtual versions of others while completely ignoring the real, the physical person right there in the presence. I began to feel utterly lonely, like a ghost walking among the undead....or maybe the other way around?
I began to notice a sharp contrast in the difference between people's online and physical versions: More and more, I began to pay more attention to people's phone and tech habits around me. More and more, I began to notice a very strange phenomenon. People would look very normal, or usually quite sad as they went about their days. They would put their camera up to their face, put on a smile, snap a picture, check it, re do it if needed, then go back to looking normal or just plain sad again. It became increasingly clear that many people were in fact living a lie in the virtual space; appearing to their online viewers as a happy-go-lucky, always joyous person, while in reality they were as sad as the people they were trying to influence. Not only did this realization strike me as absurd, it also made me hate getting my picture taken even more; where people would tell me to smile. I began to feel incredibly fake myself, putting on a smile when nothing genuine was making me smile, only to look "happy"; for the sake of looking happy. Still to this day, I can't understand why every picture we take has to be with a smile.
I realized the true value of face to face human connection: This realization probably hits harder now during our Covid dominated dreamscape, but I realized that no matter how many videos I had watched, no matter how many online forums I was a part of, no matter how many virtual conferences I do or Zoom Hangouts I do; nothing will ever compare to a genuine and face to face interaction. To be in the midst of another human being, to see the micro movements of their face, to catch the subtle changes in their voice when they respond to questions or even smell them is not something a computer can ever capture or recreate. The feeling of a handshake, or even a warm, all embracing hug will never be replaced by a virtual counterpart. Call me old school, but I for one am going to miss the time in our lives when other humans weren't something to be afraid of, but something to be cherished and loved by virtue of having been human.
To sum it all up, the tech detox was one of the most useful challenges I've ever embarked on. I continue to put many of those rules into practice still, using technology as a useful tool, and not a crutch to fill some void I fill every time something isn't needing my direct attention. That being said, I implore you to consider your current tech habits, and ask yourself: Are you using your tech, or is your tech using you?